First Impressions

FIRST IMPRESSIONS
Wi heart sair and in a flutter
I left the land o cakes and butter
The broad Atlantic I did cross
And made my way to Illinois
I worked right sair, it made me sweat.
There man’s chief end is raising wheat
On getting rich each one is bent
But that is far from my intent.
To Scotland dear I’ll soon go over
Doubtless they’ll call me Dan the rover,
A luckless spendthrift, gude for naething
Come home sae puir and scarce of cleathing
O, Dan, my boy hadst thou been wise
And tzen thine own dear Mam’s advice.
Thou ken fu weel, I said aye sae
That thou frae hame should never gae.
Thou trudged oor lang a mang the youies (ewes)
To settle out in Illinois.
To see thee back is nae surprise.
But whow thou is an unca guise
Wi hair and dirt and rags and vermin
How lang ist sin thoust heard a sermon?
We’re nae surprised to see thee thin
The banes is a’ inside the skin
A little mair than we expected
That thou has been sae weel protected.
Thy constitution--its mae joke
I doubt its a’ together broke
But thoust escaped we the life
The death it has been unca rife.
Indeed to see thee we are glad
As when thou left us we were sad.
But let them say just what they will
Of Illinois I’ve got my fill
And hameward I had better steer
Where Kirtle water runs sae clear
Bout independence, folks may talk ott
Come here and see what ye can make ott
We staff in hand and plaid on shooder
And dog at fit I wad feel prooder
Than any laird in Illinois
That ever squatted mang the sloughs.
Ance mair amang the bent and spret
My sorrow wad I soon forget.
Mang weeds and dirt and flies and fleas
I couldna think tae spend my days.
A shepherds life gae me my choice
Take a’ the land in Illinois.

1892. The pronosticator utterly failed in prognostications. Dan did not go home. No, he stayed and stayed, got married raised a family, is a grandfather, has added house to house and field to field.

Is rich in land, horses, cattle, hogs and dollars, is an honored Elder in the church, has lots of friends and is a useful man. His much regretted sheep, staff, plaid and dog of forty years ago, in vain await his coming.